It is Sunday morning, the boys are with their Papa and Nana, I am sitting outside laptop in hand and music playing. I have been working on my homework this morning, Trying to make a dent in the unending task ahead of me. The air is cool, and the birds seem to be singing with the music as it plays. I have finally found a place to listen to music with few commercials to interrupt my train of thought. It is so peaceful right now. But the day is fixing to really start and we have baseball. As I sit here I start seeing all the things that need to be done. The messes to clean and the little time I have to do it all. I know these are choices I make, but the more I see of these piles that grow and come alive when I walk into a room, I start to loose my footing, I almost start to have a panic attack, my heart races and I can hardly breathe. This all seems to follow me, everywhere I go.
But I still sit here instead of tackling something. I need a game plan, a plan of attack.
I can no longer retreat for this monster. I have to face it head on.
CHARGE

Stressed to the point of hiccups

Yes, you have read that correctly. I stressed myself out so much yesterday that I had hiccups 5 times before the night was over. I would have to stop what I was doing, stretch, breath and drink something. I started my summer classes yesterday and I was feeling very overwhelmed.
So today the game plan is to read alot, and work alot.
I have tons to do before Sunday. So off I go, I will try to avoid the hiccups.

Surreal moments and new roads

I have had something hit home this last week. Something I do not understand nor have I experienced. I have a feeling that this will not be the last time, but the first time, its humbling. Even to the person that is on on the outside looking in. A dear friend has found a mass on her breast. The steps have been fast, and the out come is still unknown. I will not release the name.
But for a dear friend please PRAY. Lift up my friend with me as she struggles with this. I pray that I can be there for her as she needs me to be. Even if its only to forget for that moment what is going on.
I have had relatives with cancers in the past, when I was a child, my husbands uncle died from cancer 3 years ago. But for some reason, today this hits my heart harder.
I know its not because I loved my family less. It has just hit different.
I will keep posting as I keep thinking of things to say, feeling I have about all this.

School, home, and everything in between

Okay, so I have been struggling these last few weeks with my LAZINESS.

I will be open and honest about all of this, I am lazy.

I hate having to pick up after myself as well as 3 men in the house. I hate picking up smelly socks, and dirty clothes. I hate washing the dishes in the sink that have been sitting there for days.
But If I dont, no one will.
So I have now tried to will myself alittle more to be better about the house work and all. By the way, it totally is not going well. I feel like I am never home and then when I am, who wants to clean. My new goal is working on the house more often and regularly.
School is going well. I have my last final on Wednesday, I think I will do well on it. I am a bit nervous. Then in 2 weeks classes begin again
So, life is moving right along!
Until next time!