Wind and the bees

Ok, I know that sounds so weird. But I am sitting at my desk at work, and outside there are some trees that attract bees to it. The bee's have been busy with this plant for days now. You can walk under the tree and the bee's do not even seem to know you are there they are so occupied with the task at hand.
Today we have high winds,which as of late has been the norm, for us around here. But these bee's are desperately trying to stay on task. It is interesting to watch the collective work it wonders.
HMMM, honey, that really is starting to sound delicious on a warm biscuit..
My mouth is watering...

Sweet Music

I need music today. I need to hear sounds of instruments being played. When I hear the music I see the person playing, and the music filling their souls. As it does mine. I try so hard to just not ever have the tv on when I am home and have music playing. Sometimes I wish I didnt have a television. But then I love my shows way to much, I become addicted to the weekly tales.
So now I immerse myself into the sweet sounds. For a little while.

A picture

I have been working on a project for school these last couple of weeks.

It is a scrapbook of my life and micro- cultures in which I exist.
It is also things that have shaped my life.
I think one of the greatest things that has shaped who I am has been my Granny.
I have been staring at her picture for the last couple of days.
I miss her greatly and her words of wisdom.
But I know that I am making her proud by doing something God has called me to do.
And though I might not know what is in the future. I know that I am doing what I was intended to do. If I had made this book a year ago, I do not think it would look the same as it does now. I think there would be many holes in it. Not as many pages would be filled.
I do not look at my life the same as I once did. And I try to not take advantage of them either.
So, with that. I know I hold my head High.
And as I stare into her blue eyes. I know Granny is busy in heaven rocking the babies or singing with the angels. She is proud of all of her children and grandchildren and great grandchildren. And when we all meet in heaven what a reunion that will be.

Just breathe

I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me, and I have been breathless for months. Waiting for the bottom to drop out of this bad luck streak we have seem to have had. Kevin has been unemployed for 6 months now. With few job offers and even fewer interviews. He has only had one interview. One in 6 months. Tomorrow he will have interview number 2. I feel like I can almost breath again. He so wants this job. It will suit our family so well. Now I just pray. Please pray with us. Pray for direction and guidance, wisdom and an open heart to what is in-store for us. So tomorrow at 3 lift him up with me.

Tuesday

Its Tuesday, nothing special about today. It is just a day. I am sitting here wanting to do something other than twiddle my thumbs and stare out the windows. So writing seemed to be a good option. But my thoughts are interrupted, so I tend not to think. Not to much anyway. I am beginning to worry, not that that is already a trait that is well within my normal standards. But my worries are now beginning to manifest into restless nights and anxieties about our future. My husband has been unemployed now for 6 months. It has been six very long months, though my children have benefited from him being at home. I grow an ulcer, no not really.
It just feels like it.
I know I need to have more faith than i do. So if you have sat down and read these lines of mine. Please take a moment to pray for us. That God will guide my family, and that a job for my husband will open its doors. That it will be something he can be proud of. And that it will allow him to be apart of the family life he has begun to enjoy.

Impatient

I have been waiting what seems like forever for news from FASFA.
Ok so what is FASFA, well it is the financial aid stuff. Very formal professional term hu?
I have been waiting for what seems like a lifetime to find out about my loans or grants or whatever will come in the form of help for me to continue with school. Waiting kills me, I want to know NOW!
I know it sounds childish all.
I feel like my world is in limbo waiting for a response from the school. But in all reality all it is. I am not PATIENT! So for today, I am trying to work on that and become more aware, and acknowledge that its all in Gods mighty hand.

The journey

I have opened my eyes to the realization that this journey I am on is just at the beginning stages. That where some people at the same point in their lives a mother, a wife; are at a different stage. I am at the beginning of my journey. See I have done things different. I have not let myself search for its path till now. I have lived then now began to search for direction and location of where God wants me to be. But maybe that was His intentions all along. Maybe I needed to live a little and grab perspective first so I could enjoy what is left of my wonderful life. Okay so now you are wondering where this all came from. Well, I am working on a project for school, a self analysis, and I find that my path is in the middle of something new. I am at a cross roads, that only I can look at and decide where it will take me next. I pray that as I follow these next steps that they are where GOD wants me to be.